You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
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