All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
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