You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Randomize
