Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
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