just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
