i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
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