is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Mass text: dear whatever jerk off who thinks they stole drugs from me. It was birth control. Go fuck yourself. And pray that I don't get pregnant.
Who puts their birth control in a bottle with a smiley face?!
Oh fuck wait
Randomize
