She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
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