My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
My hand turned me down
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
There are leaves in my underwear?
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