my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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