"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
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