actually, I'm a sock model
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
Randomize
