how can u be prego again
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
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