the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
