I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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