is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
