Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
Randomize
