i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
