Pappa wants mamma naked
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
