just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
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