Dual....:-)
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
Randomize
