No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
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