Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
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