How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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