happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
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