she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I need water and some morals
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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