Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
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