So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
My breasts were aching with rage.
MIDGETS
????
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
