I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
Randomize
