This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
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