these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Randomize
