Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
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