is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
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