i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
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