i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
