omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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