Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
