Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
the liver wants what the liver wants
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
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