he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
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