is your mom at the bar?
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
It's just like the Real World with babies
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
