i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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