where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
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