Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
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