can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Randomize
