I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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