'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
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