took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
