yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
