VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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