trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
I love having hate sex.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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